Last week my 6 year old’s teacher shared with me something that my daughter said to her. After the teacher gave her back her corrected test my daughter thanked the teacher for giving her an “excellent” on her test. Her teacher replied to her that it was you who earned it not me who gave it to you. As much as I find the expressions our children use to be adorable and quite refreshing at times, this comment made me feel sad. It further reinforced for me how our children grow up to believe that when they are successful it is the teacher that awarded them with the result and also how much success is defined by marks.
Test results can be particularly painful for students who face learning challenges. Especially when they work so hard to achieve results in a given subject like math or a language only to be disappointed when their mark doesn’t reflect the effort they put in. So what can we do as parents and teachers to help our children hold on to the desire to learn and keep working on their skills when they aren’t seeing the marks that they hoped for? Here are some tips that I can share with you as a professional and a mom:
1 - Teachers should give students qualitative feedback on their work alongside their mark. Explain to them what did well and how they can further improve their skills. After all it is their skills that we want to focus on.
2 - Offer students other ways to contribute meaningfully so that they can have the opportunity to shine in other ways. Not all students do well on tests but some are great speakers or doers, for example, who can show what they know orally or through actions by demonstrating what they have learned to the class or a smaller group.
3 - Spend some time with your students discussing their strengths. In my role as Director of Academic Support Services, I meet individually with students to review their Individualized Education Plan beginning with their strengths. Each time I am amazed at how well students know themselves in terms of what they are good at and areas that they would like to improve upon. This exercise often is what needed to reinvigorate a child for learning.
4 - As parents we need to constantly remind our children that the mistakes that they make, whether it is on a test or even receiving a consequence for incomplete homework are merely opportunities for growth and by sharing our own "oops moments".
The cracks, those imperfect moments are where the light comes through which is how we grow.
Have a great week!
Beth
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